art and culture with freeleahpepper

All photos ever featured on this glorious blog have been magically compiled into an online gallery. actual magic bc it just appeared out of nowhere, like a rabbit in a hat (with a bat and a '64 impala). 


It's like a dark and twisted art exhibit. honestly, if these images don't improve the quality of your life, I don't know what will. 


the strangest collection of photos you will ever see can be found HERE.

macaroni rascals

Breaking News!!


CNN is taking a few minutes away from reporting real news to bring us something that actually matters.


Jersey Shore News. (Even if you aren't a Jersey Shore fan, you will find this to be delightful)

It seems that Jersey Shore is now being syndicated in Japan, and the translation, well, it is mind-blowingly amazing. beyond wildest hopes and dreams. 


"MTV Jersey Shore〜マカロニ野郎のニュージャージー・ライフ〜" 


Which means. 


Drumroll please. 


 "MTV Jersey Shore -- the New Jersey life of macaroni rascals."

The most glorious translation is explained as follows:

"Our only guess is that the folks at MTV were looking for a way to translate the Italian-American epithet 'guido' and stumbled upon something more Japanese but equally un-PC. Since this is a family website, we translated 'yaro' (野郎) as 'rascals' but the pejorative word can take on much more R-rated nuances.

According to Twitter user Daniel Feit, for all the strangeness of MTV Japan's translation, the term "macaroni rascals" does appear in the Japanese subtitles of the 1972 film "The Godfather." Someone in Programming apparently did their homework."

Read more on this fast-breaking story HERE


BUT WAIT! 


a quick photo montage of things that come up on the first page (the FIRST page) of google images when the term "macaroni rascals" is searched. enjoy:

~fini~

fun with drugz

should you be a frequent reader (and you should be!) you know that I am obsessed with meth. Not with doing, more of a fascination. 


Well kids, there is a new sheriff in town. Although, this is an aesthetic fascination. 


Look at the below picture. In the bottom left corner there is a green thing. Do you know what it is? (there is an arrow in case you are bad with directions)

Do you know?


I did not.


Mescaline/Peyote.


New fascination. Expect many future posts.


Picture and education thanks to The Daily Show via NY Mag 


(I recommend the whole slideshow)

something is not right.

Things that make you go hmmmm....

Meet Cassius Marcellus Cornelius Clay:

ivygate

And here is Mr. Clay w Sir Kanye:

The story is a long, windy road...but basically this little kid (Yale class of '13..gah that makes me feel old!) anyway, he is apparently Kanye's new bff (read: lovah).Cassius (the child) was shopping at Barney's, looking at shoes, and Kanye compliments said shoes and I guess the two have been inseparable ever since? This makes no sense. I thought Kanye hated white people. And why this kid of all people? 

Seriously, I am SO confused. 

The deep level of confusion is stopping me from even commenting further at this time, I can only point you to IvyGate (it's like Gossip Girl meets Gawker for Ivy Leagues - awesome) to read the story in full. 

Someone please make sense of this madness. 

Antoine is a living Legend

Still looking for a Halloween costume idea? This is not it. 

I'm really proud of Antoine for riding his fifteen minutes...but:

Costume includes:

• Antoine Dodson Custom Hair Wig

• Red Bandana

• Black tank top

• Antoine's special rolled up paper

Costume is available here - but should you have to buy a this costume rather than make it, i deem you a fail. 

STOP EVERYTHING! WATCH THIS!

this just made my day:

Every Little Step with Mike Tyson & Wayne Brady from Mike Tyson

genius.

smooth criminal

MOTHER OF THE YEAR!

Please meet the lovely Erica Anderson, devoted mother and a bank robber!

Here are the facts:

• Erica walks into a bank in some po-dunk Oregon town and hands the teller a note asking for money, honey.
• The note ALSO instructed the teller to wait 15 minutes before calling the cops "or two kids wouldnt make it home from school today".
• Erica leaves with $1300 cash and gets in her getaway car, driven by a 19-year-old named Joshua. This is a great time to mention that Erica is 37.
• Police arrive at the bank (teller didnt wait 15 minutes, FYI) and became concerned for the safety of the children.
• No, no coppers, she was just worried she would be late to pick them up from school (it's ALL about time management when you are a bank robbing soccer mom)
• Cops arrived at Erica's house shortly after she returned home from picking up the kiddies from school and promptly arrested her. The kids were eating ice cream sammies. YUM!

The local detective, Dennis Ward, had these words of brilliance:

"We average between three and five bank robberies a year,” says Ward. “But I don’t think I’ve ever heard of anything quite like this.” 

A few things:

1. This rando town in Oregon averages 3-5 bank robberies a year!? That seems a little high. Are people getting away with it? Should I move to Oregon and live my fantasy of becoming a member of Oceans 11? or 12? or 13?

2. Why was her getaway driver a 19-year-old? Is Erica Anderson also a cougar? God, I hope so.

3. Who would rob a bank for $1300? Divided by her and her young cub. Thats only $650 each. You could probably rob a person and get away with more. I think if you are going to rob a bank, you should net at least 20k.

4. After robbing a bank, why would you go straight home??? Take your $1300 and go to six flags. Or ANYWHERE besides the FIRST place the cops will look for you. Clearly she is not a Law & Order watcher or she would have known better.

5. Vurrrrry much looking forward to the Lifetime movie made about this story.

6. I bet this bitch smokes meth.

For more on this AMAZING story, click HERE

no wire hangers everrrrrrrrrrrrrr

And the award for smartest/dumbest/most hysterical ad placement EVER goes to:

we're all moving to dayton!

A genius man by the nombre of Tristan Koehler has decided to improve the quality of life in Dayton, Ohio by offering breakfast pizza at his Domino's franchise.

I love Tristan Koehler.

Not only is this the only Domino's to serve breakfast, but it is also the ONLY 24-hour Dominos in the United States. Gah!

The glorious breakfast treat features egg and cheese on a pizza crust (not the above masterpiece) and suggested topping combos include ham and bacon, onions and jalapenos, and onion, green pepper and mushrooms. Unlike mean McDonalds, the breakfast pizza is available all day.

Im currently applying for jobs in Dayton...and you can read more HERE

Magically Delicious!

If you grew up like me, Lucky Charms were a cereal of legend, not allowed in my hippie household but PRE GOLD when I happened to be at someone else's house with less sugar-strict parentals.


Even though I now know Lucky Charms are vile, I do get excited whenever I think about those magical crispy crunchy lil gems

WELL. Get excited. A new website, www.CerealMarshmellows.com (points for original name) is selling MARSHMELLOW ONLY cereal. Yes, all marshies, all the time!


These lil bit's of leprechaun lovin' are best purchased in bulk - you can get 95 lbs for about $400, should be set for life with 95 lbs :)


Happy Breakfasting!

fatty cakes

As if we needed more reasons not to be obese...a new study out of George Washington University is the icing on the cake.

NY Post is reporting

Being obese costs women at least $4,879 more a year than if they were regular-sized -- and nearly twice what their fatty male counterparts have to pay for carrying around too much extra weight

The study goes on to say that while fat men make the same as their fit counterparts, fat women earn about $1,855 less a year.

BUT both obese boys and girls have to pay more than their skinny counterparts, reaching into their wallets for higher medical bills, more sick days, more gas to schlep their big 'ole bodies in their cars and while the study doesnt point it out, lets be honest, they spend more on food.

SO my skinny minny readers, think about this next time you are reaching for a KFC double down

funny emails from my friends

Last night i burped and it sounded like a Kitten crying. NO. JOKE. i wish so bad i could recreate. it was so awesome and so weird!

International Sexcapades

Today the Telegraph reports:

WORLD'S WORST LOVERS:
1. Germany (too smelly)
2. England (too lazy)
3. Sweden (too quick)
4. Holland (too dominating)
5. America (too rough)
6. Greece (too lovey-dovey)
7. Wales (too selfish)
8. Scotland (too loud)
9. Turkey (too sweaty)
10. Russia (too hairy)

But don't worry, here are the international men and women you should be pursuing:

WORLD'S BEST LOVERS
1. Spain
2. Brazil
3. Italy
4. France
5. Ireland
6. South Africa
7. Australia
8. New Zealand
9. Denmark
10. Canada

SPOTTED: Sloth from Goonies

o-o-o-oprah face o-o-oprah faaaaace

This website is genius

Faces of the Last Season Of Oprah

While you are at it, click HERE to Oprah-fy yourself!

seawhore the icelandic seahorse

Ah, the circle of life. A friend once said breaking up with her boyfriend felt like "taking a 500 lb shit" - now think about that while you watch this seahorse have some babies:

revenge is sweet

Today is 9-02-10

HAPPY 90210 Day!

FLP EXCLUSIVE

ladies and gentlemen,

please prepare yourself for this ground breaking discovery, which we are thrilled to report to you exclusively.

sometimes amazing things happen in the universe.

like jesus toast.



or a lesson learned on a poor decision:



today, in mr. johnson's Cheetos bag (pun not intended, but appreciated), the penis Cheetos was discovered:

i legit die for zach galifianakis

and his brother seth!

Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis: Sean Penn from Between Two Ferns

no intro needed

this child WILL be a star

See more funny videos and TBT Videos at Today's Big Thing.

funny emails from my friends

Names have been changed to protect the guilty.

Last night Bartholomew found a craisin in my belly button. and it was hours after i had eaten them. I was crying I was laughing so hard. BC right before that I was on the couch w him and I coughed and blew a glob of snot onto my upper lip. he looked horrified and jumped up to get me a tissue. and then when he came baccckkkk, i was laying on the couch laughing and he goes what the hell is in your bellybutton. and then he presented me with animal crackers.

heyyyyyy snugerena!

BEHOLD THE POWER OF GENIUS MARKETING:

because it just takes too much time to tie your sneakers

Remember the self-lacing sneakers from Back to the Future?



They are becoming a reality! Thank you Nike!

According to the company:

“…Slip a switch, and the shoe tightens as if you just pulled and tightened conventional laces. The switch activates a motor that rolls or unrolls a spool of wire distributed throughout the shoe. When the spool reels in the wire, the shoe tightens along axis supported by various rods.”

So far Nike has only filed for the patent, so it will be a few years before they hit shelves. In the meantime, please stick to velcro as to avoid salad fingers.