Katy Perry the Wedding Unicorn

Boy meets girl,

At burning man.

Boy marries girl,

with Katy Perry the (magical) Wedding Unicorn.

Katy Perry the Wedding Unicorn in all her glory.

This is no ordinary Katy Perry or Wedding Unicorn (obv) - she "pees" lemonade, shoots pink FIRE and sneezes glitter.

A guest enjoys Katy Perry the Wedding Unicorn's Lemonade Pee!

I mean. All I can really think to say is hallelujah. Suddenly I know what has been missing in my life. 

Katy Perry the Wedding Unicorn was a wedding gift from the bride + groom's friends (fellow burning man-mates, obv). She was built in Brooklyn before being carefully transported to Vermont for the nuptials. She took four months to create and cost nearly $3,000 in materials! 

Katy Perry the Wedding Unicorn shoots fire from it's uni-horn

And from another angle

Moment of true glory: Katy Perry the Wedding Unicorn shoots fire
AND sneezes glitter

The bride. 

obsession.

more HERE

Hairy Situation

WARNING: This post is not for the faint of heart. If you don't like gross things please fast forward to the next post. You've been warned.

Now if you do like gross things, sit back and relax because this is a doozie. 

this has nothing to do with a nun. 

Our story begins in Indore, India where a lovely 19 year old gal (lets call her Raita) decided to go to the hospital as she hadn't been able to eat or drink in several days and bitch was hungry. 

Raita's doctor was in for a treat! Raita liked to snack on HAIR AND CHALK and this had caused for a nasty situation. The chalk created a paste of sorts which combined with the hair RESULTED IN A FOUR POUND HAIR BALL STUCK IN HER STOMACH AND SMALL INTESTINES. 

I'll give you a minute to let that sink in.

A four pound hair ball FILLING her body.

What does a four pound hair ball look like?

(this is the gross part you've been warned)

Hairball post removal.

Goodness. That about sums it up. 

GIVE OLIVIA MUNN ATTENTION

Poor Olivia Munn. No one is paying attention to her so she is ripping her eyelashes out...and talking about it in national media.


Amurica first met Olivia Munn like this:

And she got attention because she is nakey and hot. 

Then she did some other stuff and no one cared. 

Then she played a boring economist on Newsroom and no one cared.

So, she has announced she suffers from a disorder known as trichotillomania and thus rips out her eyelashes. Munn claims it "doesn't hurt" but "is annoying". Wow.

I WANNA BE FRIENDS

with this guy

Gucci Tucci

I'm actually not even sure how to preface this image.

um.

this is a real tattoo that someone got.

there are really no words.



macaroni rascals

Breaking News!!


CNN is taking a few minutes away from reporting real news to bring us something that actually matters.


Jersey Shore News. (Even if you aren't a Jersey Shore fan, you will find this to be delightful)

It seems that Jersey Shore is now being syndicated in Japan, and the translation, well, it is mind-blowingly amazing. beyond wildest hopes and dreams. 


"MTV Jersey Shore〜マカロニ野郎のニュージャージー・ライフ〜" 


Which means. 


Drumroll please. 


 "MTV Jersey Shore -- the New Jersey life of macaroni rascals."

The most glorious translation is explained as follows:

"Our only guess is that the folks at MTV were looking for a way to translate the Italian-American epithet 'guido' and stumbled upon something more Japanese but equally un-PC. Since this is a family website, we translated 'yaro' (野郎) as 'rascals' but the pejorative word can take on much more R-rated nuances.

According to Twitter user Daniel Feit, for all the strangeness of MTV Japan's translation, the term "macaroni rascals" does appear in the Japanese subtitles of the 1972 film "The Godfather." Someone in Programming apparently did their homework."

Read more on this fast-breaking story HERE


BUT WAIT! 


a quick photo montage of things that come up on the first page (the FIRST page) of google images when the term "macaroni rascals" is searched. enjoy:

~fini~

fun with drugz

should you be a frequent reader (and you should be!) you know that I am obsessed with meth. Not with doing, more of a fascination. 


Well kids, there is a new sheriff in town. Although, this is an aesthetic fascination. 


Look at the below picture. In the bottom left corner there is a green thing. Do you know what it is? (there is an arrow in case you are bad with directions)

Do you know?


I did not.


Mescaline/Peyote.


New fascination. Expect many future posts.


Picture and education thanks to The Daily Show via NY Mag 


(I recommend the whole slideshow)